A Not So Normal Day
by yukikittycatofwisdom
Summary: What do you get when you add a hyper Killua, tired Leorio, drunk Kurapika, perverted Kuroro, Spiders, Hisoka being...Hisoka, and a crazy authoress? And why is Gon in a chicken suit anyway? HXH belongs to Togashi-sensei, not me of course! T for Hisoka XD


Yuuki: Hey~ eto…yeah…crazy idea that I had... had to write cause…yeeeah… How and why did I come up with this? The why is simple: Boredom makes people crazy

Killua: Are you sure you're not the one making people crazy?

Yuuki: eheh…ignoring…The how? I have no idea. I was taking a shower and thinking of all the homework I had to do…then I thought of Gon in a chicken suit…and it allll went downhill from there…

Gon: on-

Yuuki: *glare* don't you dare…

Gon: …I was gonna say… it was… on a Tuesday! Eheh…heh…

Leorio: nice save

Yuuki: now FINALLY! O-

Killua: on with the story!

Yuuki: D8 *sobs in corner*

A Not-So-Normal Day

It all started out as any day would. Killua and Gon would wake up at three in the morning, have a race to the kitchen, trip, and end up waking the half of the apartment that hadn't gotten earplugs and soundproof walls yet.

Then Leorio would drag himself over to the table, sit himself down, and mumble about random things. This particular morning it happened to be about tornados and frogs. Don't ask; he refuses to answer about that.

Gon would sit across from the older man, and Killua would seat himself next to him. This was about the time Leorio, still much half asleep, would pause in his mumblings, "Green little critters…speaking of little critters….KURAPIKA, I'M HUNGRY!!! Hmm…are frogs edible? Some people eat them…" Of course, his conversation with himself would resume until the blond would walk into their little kitchen.

"Make your own breakfast…" Kurapika yawned, stuffing some bread into the toaster, "You're the oldest anyways…"

"You're not usually this tired in the morning." Killua observed, chewing on a toothpick and leaning back in his chair.

Oh, but this is just the _start_ of the unusualness…

Gon cocked his head to the side, "Did you hear that?" Kurapika yawned again, "Hear what? Leorio mumbling?"

"A tornado of frogs….maybe they could sweep away the annoying neighbors….They say I talk to myself…It's obvious I don't…" Said mumbler continued his little talk. Really, you'd think someone who memorized all the bones, muscles, and such could tell if he was speaking out loud or not.

Then again, this is _Leorio_ we're talking about.

"Oh my god, there it is again!" Gon looked at Killua in horror, "The TV was right! It _is _a big conspiracy! We _have _to go and find out how to protect ourselves!" Kurapika lifted an eyebrow, pulling out the toast as Killua sweat dropped, "Dude, that was just a show!"

The rest of the day progressed as it normally would. That is, until around the time all the rest of York Shiin was eating dinner…

"Oi, ojii-san! Why're ya so late?" Killua asked, taking another bite out of his chocolate bar. Leorio hung up his coat, tired eyes inspecting the room, "Hmm…I had to study…Where're Kurapika and Gon?"

The younger boy shrugged, looking back at the Rated R movie playing on the TV, "Gon's locked himself with the computer into our room, and Kurapika left hours ago, saying he had work." Leorio plopped down onto the loveseat in the corner, "Ah…"

A few minutes later, he was fast asleep and Killua ran out of candy. The boy sighed, getting up from the sea of wrappers to the kitchen. Grabbing another box, he was about to go back when the doorbell started ringing wildly. Leorio sat up in the middle of a snore, "Who's it?"

Killua opened the door wide, watching in confusion as Kurapika continued to ring the doorbell, staring it in interest, with a slight flush covering his face.

"Uh…never rang a doorbell before? You do know you have a key, right?" The white-haired boy sweat dropped as the other looked at him, continuing to press the button.

Ding…ding….ding….ding….ding…ding…ding…ding…ding…ding…ding…ding…dingdingdingding dingdingding dingdingdi-

"Okay! That's good, I heard you the first million rings!" Killua grabbed the blond's wrist, finally ending the noise. Leorio appeared behind him, glaring, "Hello, I was _trying _to sleep here!" Kurapika stared at him with big eyes, before erupting into giggles, hiccupping every now and then.

"What!? What's so funny!?"

"Hello, my dear fruits~" A voice, just as creepy as they remembered, cooed. Hisoka stepped out of the shadows of the hall, draping an arm over the shoulder of the giggling blond, "I have a delivery for you~"

"W-what are you doing here!?" The medical student took a step away from the demented magician. Said demented magician stepped inside, pulling their friend along, "Oh, I'm just here for a visit! I brought along the lost kitten~"

"K-k-kitten!?" Killua and Leorio sputtered, mouths agape, as Kurapika rubbed his head against Hisoka's hand, making a purring sound before exploding into another round of giggles.

What had the creeper done to their friend? The blond was supposed to be the most serious of them all, after all.

Hisoka scratched him behind imaginary cat ears, "Of course~ you can't _all _be _fruit_ you know!"

"I think I'm gonna be sick." Leorio covered his mouth with a hand, face turning a sickly shade of green. Kurapika crawled – yes, _crawled_ – over to him and pawed at his leg with his hands, "Nya~"

"You've deprived him of speech too!?" Leorio fell to his knees, shaking the confused blond by his shoulders, "This is why I told you never to go out alone!" Killua absentmindedly bit into another little chocolate piece. He paused, swallowing and tasting something strange slide down his throat.

"Speak to me!"

"Uhhnn…." Little spirals replaced the boy's eyes until finally Leorio released him.

"I think you killed him." Killua stated, hiccupping and taking another chocolate from the box. The medical student eyed the box before realizing something, "Where did Hisoka go?"

"The itsy bitsy spider went up the water spout~ down came the chain and crushed the spider down~ up came the sun and burned all the remains~ and the itsy bitsy spider rots in hell hurray!" Kurapika sang, giggling at the joke, and seemingly recovered. Killua looked around, nearly dropping the box of chocolate at the sight he saw, "Oh my god…"

"What? Wha-…" They once again gaped at the…the _thing_ that walked into the room. Gon's brows furrowed, "What're you looking at me like that for?"  
"What the hell are you wearing!?" Leorio watched in shock as Kurapika crawled over to sniff the thing he was wearing. Gon crossed his arms, "I told you! We need protection from this conspiracy!"

"So…you wear a chicken suit?" Killua chomped away on another chocolate, licking the strange filling from his lips, "How is that helping, exactly?"

"Clown44 told me all about it! So far, everything he's said has come true!" Gon said, an admiring looking spreading on his face.

"C-clown44?" The pro-assassin's lip twitched, "Isn't that…Hisoka?" Just as he spoke the name, a creepy giggle floated into the room.

Hisoka walked in, dragging along a man. Kurapika hissed, hiding behind Gon's big chicken leg.

"I've brought guests~" Hisoka mused, gesturing to the people following him inside. Kuroro brushed some dust off his pants, "What is the chain user _doing_?" Phinx snorted, "Some threat." Shizuku kneeled down in front of the blond, holding out one of the chocolates Killua dropped, "Here, kitty, kitty~" Kurapika sniffed her hand, carefully biting into the chocolate as she scratched his head, "Nya~"

"Can we keep him?" She asked, looking innocently as the others. Franklin sighed, sweat dropping, "You know he's not a real cat, right?" Leorio snatched the cat-…I mean…boy away, "Shh! He'll hear you! I haven't gotten enough pictures for blackmail!" He blinked as something warm and wet slid across his cheek.

"Say cheese." Killua called, taking a picture without waiting for them to comply.

The authoress then decided to draw this scene, taking a quick break from writing. Only to return when a new idea popped up in the middle of drawing Leorio's surprised expression. Hey, it's not every day Kurapika licks the guy's cheek.

"Strange, I thought everybody would be attacking each other and I'd get to fight Dancho." Hisoka sighed in disappointment, sitting down on the loveseat in the corner and opening a bag of pretzels. Gon wobbled over to Nobunaga, staring up at him with wide eyes. The samurai whispered out of the side of his mouth, "What is the kid doing?" Machi shrugged, watching Shizuku try to take the Kuruta from Leorio.

Killua started laughing loudly, holding his stomach and rolling on the floor. Hisoka picked up the box as it was kicked closer to him, and read aloud, "Alcohol filled chocolates."

Feitan and Phinx settled onto the couch, watching the Rated R movie Killua had previously been watching but forgot about after finding Kurapika ringing the doorbell.

Shalnark sat cross-legged on the floor, observing the Zaoldyeck boy laugh, "Does he even breathe?" The other two Genei Ryoden members were nowhere to be found. Where were they? Who knows? But they weren't there. That's the important part. It's not like said authoress forgot how to spell the mummy-man's name or anything. Pfsh, why would you say such a thing? And she is not too lazy to look it up or add in Coltopi! Tsk, tsk, tsk, don't assume such things! Speaking of spiders…The authoress is hungry and shall now go off to find food.

…

Now she is back and chomping away on a Hershey Bar! Anyways, nobody cares…so return to the story!

Kurapika looked around, invisible cat ears flattening against his head, "Nya…" He sniffed, tears welling up in his eyes. Hisoka tsked, "You made the kitten cry!" Leorio tripped, sending the Kuruta, Shizuku, and somehow Shalnark, flying across the room. Shizuku picked up her glasses as she fell upside down on the couch. Kurapika looked around in confusion. Why was he suddenly airborne?

"Oof!" Woof? Ah, a dog! Kurapika sat up, finding himself sitting on Kuroro's chest. The man rubbed the back of his head where he'd hit the floor, "For someone who looks like they weigh about as much as a feather, you're rather heavy." The blond pouted, using…the _eyes_.

Yes, those are the ones.

The ones he uses to get a discount at Dunken Doughnuts when he needs his morning coffee. The ones that nobody, and I mean nobody, can say no to. Yes…_those_. As Killua laughed at the bemused expression on the Genei Ryodan Leader's face, Shalnark was still sailing through the air. Eventually, he found himself getting a blood rush to his head and the world had turned upside down. He looked to the side and found himself face to face with a knee. One with purple clothing on it. He gulped, using the knee to support himself as he looked up at what he landed on. Much to his horror, Hisoka grinned at him, "Hello, Shal~"

Ah, Hisoka…you've scarred the poor child.

Shalnark used his foot to cover the grin, not that it helped get rid of the creepiness. Killua somehow appeared behind them and laughed as the poor boy fainted.

Nobunaga's eyebrow twitched, "_Why _is the kid _staring at me_?" Machi shrugged again, curiously observing the chaos of the room. Gon continued staring up at the man, chicken suit making him look even more ridiculous. Kurapika yawned, curling up and falling asleep on Kuroro's lap. The older man sat up, poking the Kuruta. Feitan continued watching the television, "Don't you think he's taking this cat thing too far?"

Leorio massaged his temples, "Ugh…"

"You," Gon pointed up at the samurai with a feathered finger, "are…dressed strangely."

"Oh, and you're not!?" He felt a vein pulse rapidly on his forehead.

"This is for protection." The young boy stated matter-of-factly as the older man fumed, smoke beginning to stream from his ears, "Oh yeah? Bet it can't protect ya from me!"

And that is how the people living in the apartment reported seeing an oversized chicken being chased by a man dressed as a samurai.

Meanwhile, Killua had discovered that if you spin fast enough on the computer chair, you go crashing into everything like a top. Leorio jumped onto the counter, "Oi, watch it!"

"Weeee!" The boy laughed as he spun into the wall, sending a bunch of photos crashing to the ground. Awakened by the noise, Kurapika sat up, holding his head, "Ugh…I have the worst-…head…ache…" He kept his eyes closed, poking the thing he was sitting on. The floor wasn't supposed to be soft and warm, was it? And it defiantly wasn't supposed to breathe.

Opening one eye, he stared at Kuroro for what seemed like eternity. That is, if eternity was one minute long.

"AHHH!" The Kuruta blushed feverishly, staring at the man with wide, angry red eyes. Kuroro raised his hands quickly, "Okay, I know what you're thinking, but this is _not _what it looks like!" Phinx whistled, "Dancho and Kuruta sitting in a tree. S-E-X-I-N-G. First comes hate, then comes rape, then comes a-"

He was cut off as Killua spun into the couch, sending him, Feitan, and Shizuku into the wall. The pro-assassin laughed manically, spinning faster.

Hisoka dropped Shalnark on the floor and skipped – yes, I do mean _skipped_ – to the hall. Watching Nobunaga chase Gon in circles.

Many hours later, everything was quiet. So very quiet…except for lots of snoring, but still.

Killua was the first to awaken, rubbing his eyes and yawning. He looked around, seeing people sprawled across the floor. He stood up from the chair he had fallen asleep in, trying to recall the events of last night, at the same time inspecting everything in the room.

Gon, still as feathery as ever, was sleeping on the counter, Nobunaga on the floor beside him, mumbling about killing chickens. Hisoka sat on the loveseat, creepy grin still etched on his face. Shalnark lay discarded nearby, still not having awakened.

Shizuku, Feitan, and Franklin were crowded behind the overturned couch like it was some sort of shield. Phinx sat cross-legged on top of it, snoring loudly. Machi was huddled in a corner, blanket wrapped around her shoulders.

Leorio snored, possibly louder than Phinx, sleeping on the table. Kuroro slept with his back against the wall, Kurapika sprawled across his lap and chain appearing and disappearing every two seconds.

Killua yawned again, flipping through his camera to see all the pictures. Honestly, he didn't remember half of it. But he _did _remember strange tasting chocolates. He sat back down, closing his eyes and attempting to sleep again. Guess the day hadn't been so normal after all, huh?

END

Yuuki: …okay, I hated some parts, but loved others…I wanna draw Shalnark now…he doesn't get enough love XD

Killua: no comment

Gon: review please! And…you get Zaoldyeck Chocolates for free! Yes, you heard me! FREE! *holds up box* made by assassins for assassins and normal folk to enjoy! We have a limited supply so review quickly! It's not that hard! Just press that button at the bottom of the page! See it? Press it! AND you'll get Z-

Killua: What…are you doing? -_-'

Gon: Advertising

Killua: …ah… T_T

Everyone: ARIGATOU!


End file.
